You
Lost Me
by Cadet Grant Hall
Book Review of 'You Lost Me' by David Kinnaman
Has the church distanced itself from the ‘mosaic’ generation?
In his book ‘You Lost Me’, David Kinnaman describes various
ways in which the mosaics, generation Y, or the millennial
generation has distanced itself from the church. In the first
part of the book he describes three groupings which
characterize groups of people that have separated from the
church; Prodigals, Exiles, and Nomads. He then describes
characteristics of the church which has encouraged this
separation; Overprotectiveness, Shallowness, Repressiveness,
Exclusivity, and Doubting. Lastly Mr Kinnaman finishes with
solutions for this separation - in two parts. The first part
is based on his analysis of the statistical data collected,
and his findings. The second part briefly shares 50 solutions
from 50 people in society.
From collected statistical data, Kinnaman describes Nomads,
Prodigals, and Exiles, and how they have all had “significant
disengagement from church - and sometimes from Christianity
altogether” (9). It is a saddening conclusion from where I am
sitting - inside the church. Kannaman describes themes such as
“disengagement” from the church, disconnectedness from faith,
and how there have been some major generational shifts, which
contribute to the separation of this generation from the
church today (10). He personifies these three groups, and uses
Katy Perry as a typical Nomad, how she was “alienated by that
which she was raised” (70). He describes Exiles as a group
that desire to tackle the deeper issues in society, similar to
Daniel, and how he was in the world of Babylon, but not of it.
Kinnaman goes on to describe characteristics of the church
that contribute to this separation. One is shallowness, and it
is compared with apprenticeships. There are certain questions
in the survey that pick up on this character trait of the
church, “Church is boring… My church does not prepare me for
real life… God seems missing from my experience of church”
(116). It is this table of questions, repeated in other
chapters, which add weight to Kinnaman’s conclusions about
shallowness. This particular chapter goes on to describe how
to combat this, through crafting apprenticeships. Kinnaman
compares the trade of a carpenter with making a disciple. A
carpenter focuses on producing a top product, one that will
last. This is in contrast to simply producing bulk products
that may fail, break, and be defective over time. “Quantity
over quality” is a defect of the church today, how we seem
eager to “put on events for large groups of kids” rather than
“mentor each and every one of them into a mature and holistic
walk with God” (125).
For each of these six church characteristics, he compares them
to a characteristic that we should be striving for, these are
listed below:
Overprotective
vs. Discerning (104)
Shallow
vs. Apprenticeship (126)
Anti-science
vs. Stewardship (137)
Repressive
vs. Relational (153)
Exclusive
vs. Embrace (175)
Doubtless
vs. Doing (190)
Lastly in the final chapters, Kinnaman describes solutions. He
uses alliteration to describe three goals in which we, the
church should strive for: “Rethinking Relationships” (202),
“Rediscovering Vocation” (206), and “Reprioritizing wisdom”
(210). These are all positive attributes that we as
individuals can incorporate into our life. We should aim for
reconciliation in our relationships, aiming to be a church
that fosters “racial, gender, socioeconomic, and cultural
reconciliation” (203). He described how there is a lot of
positive energy, and interaction that can be gained from
incorporating intergenerational relationships. According to
Kinnaman “intergenerational relationships matter on earth
because they are a snapshot of Zion” (204). Additionally, we
should also help the people in our church to gain clarity for
their calling in life, their vocation, and what God is asking
them to do. For Kinnaman, this was the “most heartbreaking
aspect of their findings… a modern tragedy” (207).
In the final chapter, ‘the top 50’ solutions, a couple stood
out to me. One was that we should “increase our expectations”
(215). Another was to “meet a need” (229). Increasing our
expectations was a solution posed by Francis Chan. He
describes how we have low moral standards, and our motives are
off, that people leave our church as “nominal Christians”. We
need to see everyone, not just the pastor, as a person who can
pray, assume responsibility, counsel, disciple, and be
empowered by the Holy Spirit to do mighty works. In this way
we will produce mighty shepherds, and disciple-makers “rather
than service-attenders” (216).
Meeting needs was a solution posed by Shane Claiborne. This
describes how we should be “community planters”, looking to
encourage relationships among people in the streets around us.
We should grow connections, encourage neighborhood
interconnectivity, and simply be there for our neighbors.
Because of the solutions, and descriptions of the 6 failing
church characteristics, this is an awesome book to have on
hand. One that challenges, and stirs the heart to go deeper.
It is a book that brings to light some of the things that we
do now in our church, things that are simply ‘lip service’
rather than striving to go deeper, drive wisdom, and encourage
our call to truly follow Christ.
In my ministry, the ‘crafting disciples’ analogy of the
apprentice struck home for me. It made me think of those in my
life who have shaved some sharp edges off, some friends who
have spent hours sanding me down, ready for painting. This
crafting analogy is one that I will certainly take with me
after reading this book. Of course there are many other things
which I can take away: To look for the deep, meat of the word
for mature Christians, rather than the milk (1 Peter 2:2). To
have the desire to really tackle issues that confront us
today, and not shy away from them. To find ways to be
discerning in todays society, not “withdraw from culture, but
be in it” (Kinnaman 111).
So do I think the church has distanced itself from the mosaic
generation? Unfortunately, yes, I believe it has. But, because
of this research, because of people like David Kinnaman who
has collated this information, it is now up to us, up to me to
do something about it. I look forward to finding ways to craft
disciples in my life starting today.
Works Cited
Holy Bible. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2011. Print. New Intl.
Vers.
Kinnaman, David. You Lost Me: Why Young Christians Are Leaving
Church ... and Rethinking Faith. Grand Rapids, Baker Books,
2016.
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