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I
Believe, Help my Unbelief
by Tina Laforce
Sermon from Mark 9:17-24
UNBELIEF
1.
The withholding of belief; doubt; and skepticism.
2.
The state or quality of not believing;, especially in
matters of doctrine or religious faith.
doubt
to be uncertain about;
consider questionable or unlikely; hesitate to believe.
to distrust.
to fear; be apprehensive about.
WHO DO WE DOUBT?
Do we doubt that
God is really concerned about us?
Has anyone ever
doubted themselves??
I know I did, BIG
TIME!
I grew up in an
abusive home as a child.
I’ve experienced many disappointments under the hands
of my foster parents.
The people that were supposed to protect me and take
care of me, abused me.
I was abused mentally, physically and sexually.
I was never told that I was loved or did I ever know
what hugs were.
My real father had an accident when I was four and my mother
lost me and my older siblings due to alcohol.
It became her support after my father’s death.
My foster mother constantly yelled at me and ingrained
into me that I was worthless, ugly and stupid.
She kept telling me that I was going to end up just
like my mother. My foster father, who was supposed to raise a
young girl to become a young lady with values and good morals,
stole my innocence.
He would come to my room or take me out somewhere to
get what he wanted.
I would run away or lock myself in an attic
crawl-space. I
became fearful, shy, needy and insecure.
Then, in two separate occasions, I was raped at 14,
then at 16. I
doubted the people around me, mistrusted intentions, yet
craved love and acceptance.
I thought “maybe this one is honest and trustworthy”
and then end up with another disappointment.
I was raped by a cop at the age of 18.
I felt like I had asked for all this and that I brought
this all onto myself.
I gave up on myself and quit fighting back.
I figured that being treated like dirt was my lot in
life. All men are
not to be trusted and neither was anyone else for that matter.
As an adult I felt a cloud of depression hover over me.
I was the person that sat in the back of the room or
never versed my opinion or thoughts because I didn’t think
anybody wanted to know how I felt.
I dressed dowdy and drab.
As long as no one noticed me or looked at me, that was
fine. I could not
look at anybody in the eye.
I felt incompetent, degraded and oblivious of what was
happening around me.
Life was passing me by and I merely existed from day to
day. At my jobs
whenever I was called to the office it was “Oh..oh.. What did
I do wrong now!” I became a people pleaser and always went by
their decision or accepted things no matter how disappointing
they were. I just
caved in to gloom and sadness.
I met someone who loved me and actually asked me to
marry him. I was
happy but it was short lived.
After two years of marriage and a baby, I was raped
again by some friends of my husband.
That was the last straw.
I was no good, I was trash.
I doubted myself as a wife and mother.
I felt like the worst person on earth and the world
would be better off without me.
IN DESPAIR, I ATTEMPTED SUICIDE.
I DIDN’T WANT TO GO ON BEING USED AND ABUSED BY MEN..I
LEFT THE HOUSE AND JUMPED IN MY HUSBAND’S TRUCK.
YET, ON THAT DAY, GOD INTERVENED.
I tried to drive myself over a huge embankment in a
rain storm. My
tears came faster than the wipers on the windshield.
As I picked up speed I felt my foot come off the
accelerator. I
cried “NO!” I
don’t want to live!
I ended up in front of a church talking to Jesus on the
cross and asked Him if He really saw me and if He really cared
for me.
“Do you even know that
I exist?”.
He must have
because two years later I heard Him call my name.
He introduced Himself to me.
They said He loved me.
Me? They
said if I was the only person on this earth, He would have
still gone to the cross.
Really?
They said I will be forgiven and all my sins would be washed
away.! They said
that all I had to do was accept Him into my life and He
would always be there to love and forgive me for everything
that I did in my life.
EVERYTHING!?
I sobbed and sobbed.
I surrendered my life,my past and my future into His
hands. So I
CONFESSED. REPENTED
and accepted Him into my life.
I was a new creation.
The OLD IS GONE AND THE NEW HAS COME.
I was doing
pretty good for awhile but somehow, life took over, I
stumbled, I would
confess and ask for strength.
Then down I went again.
I tried and tried not to fall into sin but I just
couldn’t do it.
More disappointments and
my doubts returned.
How can God use me?.
I am such a failure in being a good Christian.
I could not seem to accept Him at face value.
It said He loved me and He will protect me but I
couldn’t see how.
I didn’t think I qualified for that in my life.
I feared the worse and expected that I would be asked
to do the impossible.
I stumbled and fell many times.
I couldn’t understand how anyone could love this person
who constantly sinned over and over again.
I walked my walk with my head down, under that same
cloud of depression.
I stuggled financially, emotionally and thought I
didn’t have what it took to walk a good Christian life.
I was a pessimist.
No victory, no joy.
Only self-doubt and fear.
I was my worst judge.
IDENTIFIED WITH
EEYORE. Eeyore is
a character characterized as a pessimistic, gloomy, depressed,
old grey stuffed donkey in Winnie the Pooh.
He has a long, detachable tail (with a pink bow on the
end,) of which he is very fond, but that he is also prone to
losing. Eeyore
lost his tail in the Hundred Acre Wood.
Once, Christopher Robin found it, he pinned it back on
with a drawing pin.
Eeyore lived in the Hundred Acre Wood, in an area
labeled "Eeyore's Gloomy Place: Rather Boggy and Sad". He has
a stick house therein, which collapses rather regularly.
Nearly all of Eeyore's houses have been bounced down by
-woozles. Eeyore
is not good at rebuilding the houses;. Yet he soldiers on and
rebuilds them time after time.
His catchphrases are "Thanks for noticin' me" and
"Ohhh-kayyy".
I was still
battling loneliness and my desire to find love and security.
I would go out to the bars once in awhile, get involved
with the wrong guy and hate myself even more.
I would cry out to God one night and crave affection
the next.
Was God really with me?
Can He really help me?
Doubt, doubt and more doubt.
Then one night
after another disappointment with ‘umph’ a man,
I had a powerful encounter with God.
I cried out to Him just sick and tired of being sick
and tired. I was
so lonely and felt like I was the only person in this world
with no one to love me.
That night, I distinctly heard God say,
Tina “What are you looking for in a man?” I said… I
want to be loved.
He said. “I love you” “What else are you looking for in
a man?” I said….
Acceptance.
He said, “I accept you for who you are” “What else are
you looking for in a man?”
I said….
Appreciation.
He said, “I appreciate you, your special to me”
“What else are you looking for in a man?”
I said….
Security. He
asked. “Can you
not trust in me to provide your every need?”
“What else are you looking for in a man?”
I said. I need
someone to hold me and be there for me.
He said “ Can you let me hold you, comfort you and
doesn’t it say, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you’?”
He never stopped.
He asked me again and again and for everything I
replied, He had an answer or a question, usually from His
word. “What else
are you looking for in a man?” I
said, intimacy,
fulfillment.
He said, “ I can supply ALL, not some, but ALL your needs.
I want an intimate relationship with you.
I can fill you with my Spirit. Can you trust me to do
that? ” “What else are you looking for in a man?’
I want someone
to talk to and someone who will talk to me”.. He said.
“Are we not having a conversation?”
I said, ”YES Lord“ and I cried as though He was holding
me.
A Scripture that
spoke volume to me is found in John 8: 7-11.
The story of the woman caught in adultery.
The scribes and the Pharisees
were prepared to stone her.
Jesus said to
the crowd gathered:
“He who is without sin among you,
let him throw a stone at her first.” 8 And again He stooped
down and wrote on the ground. 9 Then those who heard it, being
convicted by their conscience went out one by one, beginning
with the oldest even to the last. And Jesus was left alone,
and the woman standing in the midst. 10 When Jesus had raised
Himself up and saw no one but the woman, He said to her
“Woman, where are those accusers of yours? Has no one
condemned you?” 11 She said, “No one, Lord.” And Jesus said to
her, “Neither do I condemn you; go and sin no more.”
From that moment
on, I finally believed in His Love, in His Power and His
Spirit. I
realized that I was going by works and by my own strength.
I needed HIS STRENGTH.
Zechariah 4:6:
Not
by might nor by power, but by My Spirit,’ Says the LORD of
hosts.
I stopped trying
and gave up the fight.
I allowed Him to work in my life and was set free from
the bondage of loneliness and lust.
There was no doubt in my mind about His love for me and
my position in Him.
I saw that if I was willing, He could use me to touch
lives. In Him I
am a conqueror, an ambassador and a soldier.
I fight for His Kingdom and my desire is to change
lives through Him, with Him and for Him.
Whenever I stumbled, I never let it get me down.
I didn’t give up on myself.
Someone said to
me many years ago.
“Whenever you stumble, (which you will), don’t give up.
PICK YOURSELF UP, BRUSH YOURSELF OFF AND KEEP ON
GOING.. So now I
pray, read His word and allow Him to work in my life. I am
prepared to take risks, to trust and I can talk, and yes, I
have a voice. I
am no longer gripped by fear of the unknown and.
I am more of an optimist instead of a pessimist.
And best of all I I can give and receive hugs too.
Was I putting my
faith and trust in God before that?
NO!
UNBELIEF
- How do we deal
with unbelief?
How do we put our faith into practice?.
How do we stop listening to the criticism, the
condemnation and to the lies of the enemy?.
FIRST:
Surrender your life to Him.
Ask him to become Lord in your life.
Don’t try being in control.
Romans 10:9
That if you confess with your mouth
the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised
Him from the dead, you will be saved.
SECOND:
Stop and Listen.
Take Him at his word
1 John 1:9
If we confess our sins, He is
faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us
from all unrighteousness.
2 Corinthians
12:9
And He said to me, “My grace is
sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in
weakness
Deuteronomy 31:6
Be strong and of good courage, do
not fear nor be afraid of them; for the LORD your God, He is
the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake
you.”
Hear what God is
saying to you.
What helped me was personalizing the scriptures
Like, Tina Be
strong and of good courage.
Do not fear.
THIRD:
Walk away from Temptation.
Turn around,
redirect or make a U-Turn.
My GPS says –
“Whenever possible and safe to do so – MAKE A U-TURN”.
I THINK THIS WOULD BE SAFE TO DO SO.
Sometimes God
provides a way out.
Like a phone call or a friend in need of help.
Maybe a knock at the door.
Or you can call a friend.
Go out and help someone else.
It’s called distraction.
FOURTH:
Let us Pray continuously, Trust in
Him and Believe in Him.
Story!
A guy falls into
the river. He
said to God.
GOD.......IF YOU LOVE ME YOU WILL SAVE ME.
A log went by him and he didn’t notice it. .
Not long after he saw a raft on the banks but payed no
attention to it.
A man in a rowboat went by.
He asked him if he needed any help. He said, no thank
you – God will save me.
He drowns and goes to heaven.
He asked God.
How come you didn’t save me?
God said “I tried.
I sent you a log, a raft and then a row boat.
Why didn’t you accept my answer?
Recently I heard
someone say: “Hope for the best and prepare for the worst”.
I say:
“Pray for things at its worst and expect God to give
you His best”
Therefore, pray
to God for everything.
By yourself or with friends.
But pray and keep on praying.
In Matthew 17:20,
we read, “He replied,
“Because you have so little faith. Truly I tell you, if you
have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this
mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing
will be impossible for you.”
And
Mark 11:23 says:
“Truly
I tell you, if anyone says to this mountain, ‘Go, throw
yourself into the sea,’ and does not doubt in their heart but
believes that what they say will happen, it will be done for
them.
Let God help us
touch lives through us
Believe.
Stop with the doubt.
Let God take away what is holding us back from
believing what He says in His Word.
Let’s not be like Thomas.
Let us take that step of faith and believe.
It says, He will
supply our every need, He will protect us.
He will give up power to trample down serpents-- ,
power to heal the sick .
We can bring freedom to the ones bound by whatever
addiction or sin that enslaves others and even ourselves.
Do you have to
get rid or any unbelief? Do you doubt that God even does care
for you? Do you believe that he will answer your prayers?
Can we just give
Him our unbelief and ask for His help to believe that He does
care for us.
In a bit, The
Mercy Seat is OPEN!
…Let us surrender
our unbelief.
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